# Comedy skit about a gas station robbery

- Original post: https://www.twitter.com/i/status/2118807487457480974
- Source account: [@WearForbidden](https://x.com/WearForbidden)
- Source language: English
- Target language: English
- Duration: 2:04
- Published: 2026-11-06
- Machine translated. Check the original before quoting.
- Canonical URL: https://preview.translate.mom/transcript/JhVKFtiN9RZx/transcript-of-comedy-skit-about-a-gas-station-robbery

## Transcript

[0:00](https://preview.translate.mom/transcript/JhVKFtiN9RZx/transcript-of-comedy-skit-about-a-gas-station-robbery) I need $20 on pump five, Muhammad. My name is Samir, and you got it, boss.

[0:05](https://preview.translate.mom/transcript/JhVKFtiN9RZx/transcript-of-comedy-skit-about-a-gas-station-robbery?t=5) Don't give us that halal gas, buddy.

[0:13](https://preview.translate.mom/transcript/JhVKFtiN9RZx/transcript-of-comedy-skit-about-a-gas-station-robbery?t=13) Chudley, is that you?

[0:19](https://preview.translate.mom/transcript/JhVKFtiN9RZx/transcript-of-comedy-skit-about-a-gas-station-robbery?t=19) C- Cuckley?

[0:26](https://preview.translate.mom/transcript/JhVKFtiN9RZx/transcript-of-comedy-skit-about-a-gas-station-robbery?t=26) Whoa. Is that your twin?

[0:30](https://preview.translate.mom/transcript/JhVKFtiN9RZx/transcript-of-comedy-skit-about-a-gas-station-robbery?t=30) No. Yes.

[0:33](https://preview.translate.mom/transcript/JhVKFtiN9RZx/transcript-of-comedy-skit-about-a-gas-station-robbery?t=33) We're not related. Chudley, we shared a womb.

[0:37](https://preview.translate.mom/transcript/JhVKFtiN9RZx/transcript-of-comedy-skit-about-a-gas-station-robbery?t=37) And you were a commie in there, too.

[0:40](https://preview.translate.mom/transcript/JhVKFtiN9RZx/transcript-of-comedy-skit-about-a-gas-station-robbery?t=40) Chudley, this is my partner. Your business partner?

[0:44](https://preview.translate.mom/transcript/JhVKFtiN9RZx/transcript-of-comedy-skit-about-a-gas-station-robbery?t=44) My life partner, Chudley.

[0:50](https://preview.translate.mom/transcript/JhVKFtiN9RZx/transcript-of-comedy-skit-about-a-gas-station-robbery?t=50) Dude, your brother's a liberal? I don't wanna talk about it.

[0:53](https://preview.translate.mom/transcript/JhVKFtiN9RZx/transcript-of-comedy-skit-about-a-gas-station-robbery?t=53) That's incredibly offensive. We're proud progressive socialists.

[0:56](https://preview.translate.mom/transcript/JhVKFtiN9RZx/transcript-of-comedy-skit-about-a-gas-station-robbery?t=56) Dude, am I tripping right now?

[0:59](https://preview.translate.mom/transcript/JhVKFtiN9RZx/transcript-of-comedy-skit-about-a-gas-station-robbery?t=59) Boss, you still want the 20 on pump five?

[1:01](https://preview.translate.mom/transcript/JhVKFtiN9RZx/transcript-of-comedy-skit-about-a-gas-station-robbery?t=61) Yes, Abdul. Chudley, that's Islamophobic. Actually, that's my middle name.

[1:05](https://preview.translate.mom/transcript/JhVKFtiN9RZx/transcript-of-comedy-skit-about-a-gas-station-robbery?t=65) Don't mansplain me when I'm defending you.

[1:09](https://preview.translate.mom/transcript/JhVKFtiN9RZx/transcript-of-comedy-skit-about-a-gas-station-robbery?t=69) Everybody get on the ground. This is a robbery, people.

[1:12](https://preview.translate.mom/transcript/JhVKFtiN9RZx/transcript-of-comedy-skit-about-a-gas-station-robbery?t=72) Ah! Wait. Before we criminalize him, has anyone considered his socioeconomic circumstances?

[1:17](https://preview.translate.mom/transcript/JhVKFtiN9RZx/transcript-of-comedy-skit-about-a-gas-station-robbery?t=77) Be quiet.

[1:20](https://preview.translate.mom/transcript/JhVKFtiN9RZx/transcript-of-comedy-skit-about-a-gas-station-robbery?t=80) Not in my store, habibi. Ah! Can we please deescalate without reinforcing systemic oppression?

[1:25](https://preview.translate.mom/transcript/JhVKFtiN9RZx/transcript-of-comedy-skit-about-a-gas-station-robbery?t=85) Ah! We were ambushed by Antifa and Black Lives Matter.

[1:31](https://preview.translate.mom/transcript/JhVKFtiN9RZx/transcript-of-comedy-skit-about-a-gas-station-robbery?t=91) Then Hamas came out from behind the counter with an AK-47, and this is all because Republicans lost the midterms.

[1:44](https://preview.translate.mom/transcript/JhVKFtiN9RZx/transcript-of-comedy-skit-about-a-gas-station-robbery?t=104) We were attacked by white nationalists, MAGA extremists.

[1:49](https://preview.translate.mom/transcript/JhVKFtiN9RZx/transcript-of-comedy-skit-about-a-gas-station-robbery?t=109) But police arrested a robber.

[1:53](https://preview.translate.mom/transcript/JhVKFtiN9RZx/transcript-of-comedy-skit-about-a-gas-station-robbery?t=113) Robber? He was reclaiming generational wealth.

[1:58](https://preview.translate.mom/transcript/JhVKFtiN9RZx/transcript-of-comedy-skit-about-a-gas-station-robbery?t=118) And frankly, that question was racist.